Hey! Did you update this thing?
Yup. January 21, 2003. I'd changed, the site had changed —
it was a whole new world. The gods demanded that this be acknowledged.
Are you ever going to update it again?
Well, maybe. It's not like anyone's gonna read it twice.
But I read it twice!
Yeah, but I made you up. You don't even exist.
*ahem*. Neither do any of your other "readers."
Some of them do!
Is the old FAQ still up anywhere?
So, do you still need a job?
I'm always looking for freelance writing and editing
work, and am always interested to hear
about full-time opportunities, yes.
Are you any good at that kind of thing?
So how do you account for all the miserable dreck
you publish on this site?
You get what you pay for?
Ha ha. Seriously, what's Provenance Unknown all about?
Nothing much, really. Mostly it's just a place where I can write
stuff and feel like it's going somewhere. But few of the things
here are ends in themselves; they're all basically just practice.
Practice for what?
Who knows. I just want to learn to write a little better.
But why publish, if your writing's not perfect?
Well, why not? Besides, you never know, I might write something
worthwhile by accident.
Why did you call it "Provenance Unknown"?
It just seems kind of accurate.
On the Internet, as they say.
Also, I do hope that whatever I say here will speak for itself —
if it doesn't, it's probably not worth all that much.
What do you use to design and edit the pages on this site?
I figured out just enough Photoshop to create the logo, and did the rest in BBEdit.
Movable Type powers the front page and archive,
and I code all the layout by hand.
What's up with the free editing deal?
It's something I'm good at, and sometimes words are important. So I figure it's
something I can contribute, to give something back, as it were. And if I happen to
meet some cool people or maybe even get some paid work in the bargain, then it's even better.
What sound or noise do you hate?
Styrofoam. Anything to do with styrofoam.
What's your favorite curse word?
Why don't you have any personality-test results or wishlists or pictures of your cat on your site?
I don't have a cat. In fact, item No. 16 in my lease states, in all caps no less,
that "No dogs, cats, fish, birds, or other animals and pets of any kind shall be
brought in or kept in or around the building or premis. either by the tenant
or his/her family or guests, or invitees, servants or agents, except by
written permission of the landlord. Any pets kept by tenant shall constitute
immediate breach of rental agreement."
That's pretty, um ... all caps, huh?
Yeah. And the worst part is, the servants weren't actually mine, they were
the cat's. So now I don't have any servants any more, either.
It's a wonder that cats have allowed this blatant descrimination against them to persist.
They have the necessary backing for a broad civil rights package lined up in Congress,
but I think their lobby is having trouble making sure the dogs stay in the,
um, "doghouse," as it were. But it's just a matter of time.
Apparently the latest survey showed that 9 out of 10
wealthy spinsters has a cat.
I suppose they need to keep them around, if they don't want to lose their servants.